I have big boobs. This is not bragging. One boob is bigger than the other boob and therefore neither boob is ever happy in the bras I buy for them.
I get fitted at fancy places and buy a bra for over a hundred dollars. One of the boobs is unhappy. I order four bras, none of them costing more than 25 dollars, both of the boobs are unhappy. I get fitted at a more reasonably priced place, buy a bra for 40 dollars and end up with this weird full coverage bra that doesn’t work because the front rises up when I sit down and my bra shows above the V neck shirt or dress I am wearing. AND one boob is unhappy.
What. Do. I. Do?!
I am so tired of this. I get fitted, it’s wrong. I ordered from Thirdlove and it was waaaaaay too small. And now they seem to be permanently sold out of the larger sizes. I strike out on my own at department stores and those bras are weird. I find a custom place online but they don’t make a bra with two different cup sizes. I’m too big to go without a bra, sports bras give me a uniboob and the bra I am wearing as I write this is killing me.
Why isn’t this situation improving? What am I doing wrong? I live in Los Angeles. There has to be someone somewhere within a 50 mile radius who can make me a bra that fits. I am willing to pay for the bra. It doesn’t have to be pretty. It just has to not hurt.
Why does this situation feel so impossible? I cannot be the only person with this problem. I just keep thinking if I could get someone to measure me and my boobs then they can order premade bra cups and sew them together with some hooks and straps. There has to be warehouses full of all the pieces and parts of bras. I thought about buying two bras, one that fits one boob and one that fits the other and then maybe I could take them apart and sew them together to make a sort of Frankenstein’s bra…but I am not a good enough seamstress to manage this task. And what is this, the Old West? I don’t churn my own butter and I’m not making my own dresses out of flour sacks, why do I have to make my own bra?
This is a problem that knows no size. People with small boobs can have the same bra dilemma (bra-lemma). Fit the bigger boob and have the smaller one swim around or fit the smaller one and have boob spillage on the larger one’s side. This is a small problem that should have a quick solution.
But there isn’t. And I have tried inserts to even out the boobs. They slip or they are weirdly hot or one was so heavy it hurt my shoulder because it weighed on the bra strap. Sometimes I genuinely wish I didn’t have boobs and what kind of nonsense is that? My boobs aren’t the problem, the products made to corral them are the problem.
Someone please help. Start a custom bra company. I will be your first customer. I promise. I have frequent flier miles. I will come to you.