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our new movie night

Our New Movie Night

Felicia and I watched Logan Lucky on Saturday night. She was on her couch 200 mikes away from where I was on mine. Took us a bit to sync up the sound but aside from that it was great fun to watch a movie together. Our new movie night wasn’t so bad, especially if you find a movie as charming as Logan Lucky. Read more

Questions Not to Ask Yourself During Quarantine

Questions Not to Ask Yourself During Quarantine

Now is not the time for me to reassess my life. Maybe for some people, a worldwide pandemic where you are locked into your house with a partner you stopped loving and started hating 6 years ago is a perfect time to say, “Time for a change.” However, for me, quarantine is no time to ask the big questions. Read more

I'm Just as Surprised as You

I’m Just as Surprised as You

Here we are, the dawning of our third year…what exactly are we doing here? I’m just as surprised as you to realize that somehow, some way we are still writing blog posts, taking pictures, wrestling with f#cking instagram and realizing that Pinterest is very easy to use. Long live Pinterest! And the Pinterest fail. Read more

Im So Angry and It Feels Weird

Why Am I So Angry?

It’s time to start talking about anger. Healthy anger motivates, makes waves and instigates change. But there is some anger that just builds, layer on layer, until it fills us up and comes pouring out. Why am I always so angry? Nothing goes quickly in life. No. Thing. Not traffic. Not doctor’s appointments. Not any transaction at any retail establishment anywhere ever. My food order is usually wrong. My jeans don’t fit my thick middle. Nothing about my daily frustrations are new. Same shit different day. So why am I still so angry about it? Read more

What the Hell are We Doing Here

What the hell are we doing here?

What the hell are we doing here? Well, a little history wouldn’t be amiss… Read more

Back to the Beginning of RuPual's Drag Race

Back to the Beginning of RuPaul’s Drag Race

Okay. Deep breath. There have been 11 seasons of RuPaul’s Drag Race. On August 19th of this year it was announced that there will be a 12th season. Many marriages don’t last as long as this show. And do you know why? Because most people do not work as hard on their marriages as RuPaul works on this show. So, in honor of RuPaul’s work and Older Son’s and my dear friend Cynthia’s love of this show, I am going back to the beginning of RuPaul’s Drag Race. I will either rewatch or watch for the first time all 11 seasons. 

I am not committing to All Stars. There are 5 seasons of that show. That’s 16 seasons. I am only one person and I do need to do other things. If I end a gibbering idiot at the end of this, so be it. Join me as I go back to the beginning of RuPaul’s Drag Race.

You gotta work.

From an excellent article by  

Since “Drag Race” first aired in 2009, the conversation around identity and gender has shifted tremendously. For all the show has done to challenge its audience’s notions of masculinity and femininity, it has shied away, until the most recent season, from any serious discussion about the ways the drag community intersects the trans one. There have been trans queens on the show, but the topic is a touchy one in the drag community. For most drag artists, the point is the performance; it is not their sole identity. But for those queens who identify as trans or nonbinary, their stage persona is not necessarily a performance. The centerpiece of the show is the contestants’ transforming themselves into queens, and then, after each competition, taking off their wigs and removing synthetic breasts to reappear as men. For years, “Drag Race” prioritized entertainment over any nuances of the culture. Much of the queens’ vernacular, body language and movements come from the drag world’s — especially white queens’ — interpretation of black femininity. I’ve always been uncomfortable with that phenomenon, despite how much I enjoy the show. In his essay “ ‘Draguating’ to Normal,” the academic Josh Morrison argues that by using the bodies of women, people of color and other marginalized groups, “through an often loving, well-intentioned impersonation of them,” drag “unintentionally does them discursive violence.”

She's All Fat Goes to Camp

She’s All Fat Goes To Camp

I love the She’s All Fat Podcast. But this episode, SAF Goes To Camp, is a keeper among keepers. It’s about the experience of going to fat camp as a young child or teenager.

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All the Moms

All the Moms

Dear All the Moms,

We see you working. Wherever you are, whatever you are doing, we know you are doing your best.  Read more

Tending the Home Fires Facebook Group

Tending the Home Fires Facebook Group

Taking care of people is hard. It can be deeply rewarding, but let’s face it, it’s also really, really hard. Whether it’s children, elderly parents, sick spouses, special needs family members, or even ourselves, taking care of human beings requires a tremendous amount of energy. And yet for mothers and other caregivers, we do it every, single day, often with little recognition or appreciation. Read more

Happy Holidays

Happy Holidays

Why have we made wishing each other joy during the darkest time of the year so difficult? Happy Holidays is perfectly reasonable because 1) a lot of important holidays happen around wintertime and 2) if you don’t know the person very well, why would you want to take the chance of making them feel left out?

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