The Madwoman in the Volvo

This morning, when another mom cut in front of me in the drop off line, I honked at her. When she glared at me in her mirror, I mouthed a foul word back at her. This seems the perfect week to talk about perimenopause.

After giving it some thought, I am fine with myself. Before last year I never, ever would have done such a thing but my universe has altered so completely I can’t believe I haven’t been doing this all along. I didn’t ram into her car so no lasting harm done. And the next time she thinks of cutting the line at drop off maybe she won’t, for fear of some other crazy mom calling her on it. All our kids are late, own your shitty morning time management skills and get in line with the rest of us.

And that leads perfectly into this week’s reading challenge, Sandra Tsing Loh’s The Madwoman in the Volvo. I enjoyed the first few pages so much I called Felicia and did something I never do. I assigned her the book, demanded she buy it and read it along with me. We have been stumbling and bumbling our way into middle age with no clear idea what the hell we are doing and then along comes Sandra Tsing Loh.

Here’s someone on a journey we recognize. There are many books written by women going through life changing experiences. These women tend to travel to beautiful places. Or go on super long hikes. Felicia and I have kids and parents and jobs and don’t have time to go somewhere breathtaking and figure out what the hell to do with the pieces of our shattered lives.

I have a kid to drop off and pick up. Homework, dance, my dad is in the stage of life where he cycles in and out of the hospital. Older Son lets me watch his dog. I have shit to do.

And so does Sandra. Her journey into midlife is laced with all the trappings I recognize. Target. Trader Joe’s. Kids. Huddling with friends attempting to figure out how to keep our lives somewhat on track. Booze. Food. Filthy cars.

And finally, this:

“The middle-aged women I know, clawing their way one day at a time through this passage, have no rules-they glue themselves together with absolutely anything they can get their hands on.”

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